I dated a girl off and on for about a year and a half, and she has herpes. We had pretty consistent sex, and usually wore a condom, though not always. She also takes valtrex. I never contracted herpes from her. I just got checked recently and I\'m still clean. I thought the risk was low enough and I liked her enough that I was willing to take the chance.
It\'s supposed to be low, but you can\'t see the outbreaks that easily, since they aren\'t just on the outside. A condom cuts the risk in half. Valtrex also lowers the risk - if she\'s taking it daily for suppression, and theoretically also if you take it as prophylaxis. I think HPV is harder to go from female-->male than HSV. The body can clear HPV...though HSV is basically permanent.
Coming from someone who has slept with someone with hsv-2. If she has it and you sleep with her you\'ll likely get it even if there isn\'t an outbreak. My partner never had one but I got it from her. I\'ve never had an outbreak but got tested a year later and had it. It\'s not the end of the world but it\'s a choice you have to make knowing you\'ll likely get it if you don\'t use protection.